Resolution Schmesolution!Dec 31, 2018
'Tis the season for feeling crappy about ourselves, deciding to "do something about it" and setting a resolution. Just typing that sentence felt crappy, so I bet if you're in this place right now, you're not feeling the best either ;) This week I'm going to be talking about resolutions in the FaceBook group, but not in the traditional new-year's resolution way that I'm already sick of even before January officially starts. I want to talk about the TRUE meaning of resolution. To resolve. To be committed and dedicated to something so strongly that you will do whatever it takes to see it through. And, funnily enough, resolution also means the final solution to a problem. I find parenting to be the perfect embodiment of both of those ideas. I can't think of anything I am any more dedicated to than my kids, and doing whatever it takes to see my commitment to them through pretty much always means constant problem solving. That's why I find that mothers are uniquely suited to achieving goals: no one knows like we do the real meaning of resolution. Motherhood has groomed us for exceeding our own expectations first by showing us time and again that we can do it (I pushed a human being through my skeleton; now most other obstacles seem easily surmountable!), then by putting us in the position to do it over, and over, and over again every day in tiny (my kids got to school on time!) and huge (my kid graduated high school!) ways. So what is stopping us from achieving the personal goals we set for ourselves sometimes? I submit that it has nothing to do with ability and everything to do with belief. Despite the mile-long list of herculean accomplishments every mother could write about herself, every one of my clients starts out feeling like she is failing her kids and doing it all wrong. We don't see our amazingness. We don't believe we are miraculous. Why on earth would a person who thinks so little of herself ever expect to achieve her goals or stick to her resolutions?
This year, if you've decided to set a resolution for yourself or your family, I encourage you first to realize and deeply connect with the incredible accomplishments you've already achieved. It's a hell of a lot easier to approach a task feeling like you're building on momentum, rather than running through molasses. You've got this mama!